I'm looking forward to ramadan. I'm kind of tired of eating. I think fasting should be real good for me. Also, i've been trying to eat a clove of garlic as often as possible (one a day was the hope, but i haven't been keeping up) and garlic is really hard to eat. Damn it's hot. It burns my face and makes my eyes water. But I've heard it's good for you, so i talk myself into thinking i can handle it.
It's weird going through negative spells. Telling yourself how much you've wasted. Looking at the things you've dreamed of, and thinking that none of it really matters, even if you were to surprise yourself with accomplishing it. It's weird, because i dont know where these thoughts come from. I dont know where joy comes from either, but nobody dwells on joy, so it doesn't matter much.
The thing about unhappiness for me, is that i like to feel it alone. I dont like being around people when i'm unhappy, especially if i think they're trying to cheer me up. It's like i'm unhappy, and i dont like it, but i know that's how i should be feeling. Sometimes i think that i get some good thinking in when i'm unhappy, but it might be wishful thinking.
So what can music be? Does it only exist because it's easier to relate with tones then it is with words? Cause i'm pretty sure that has to be true. When you hear music, your reaction is involentary. Words on the other hand are too definate, you have to understand what a word means to relate to it. Nobody understands music's effect on people.
So there's some thought for you, for me. Thought driven by dissatisfaction. So i'll just hurt my face a little more, munching on garlic. I'll tell myself again that i wont smoke pot. I'll wish that i was fasting. I'll miss the loneliness that I didn't appreciate out west. And i'll try to find someone that i would be excited to spend my evening with. I'm very confused about what I want. Dont know what makes me happy, or even if i should be aiming for happiness. Aiming for health is nice, but it's harder to stick to.
I guess that's all i've got to say for now. I think september should be pretty cool.
When i was driving home from buying a battery there was this father and a little kid crossing in front of me to go into home depot, and i slowed down a long ways away to let them pass, the dad looked thanks at me, i gave him a nice nod, and he shot out this huge thumbs up. It was increadable. I was elated, and soon after passing by i beat the steering wheel in a joyous outburst. It was just such a quality interaction.
So let me know if anyone out there has some sort of mic and computer. Maybe i'll buy you dinner. Unless it's dave. I dont owe you shit.
The people that showed up late already know i love them. The people that showed up after i left i may or may not like at all. But i'm glad you went.
Uh, home sweet home. Call me!
Fuck i look forward to being home. Cheers.
Peaches and Cream, my bitches.
It's weird going through negative spells. Telling yourself how much you've wasted. Looking at the things you've dreamed of, and thinking that none of it really matters, even if you were to surprise yourself with accomplishing it. It's weird, because i dont know where these thoughts come from. I dont know where joy comes from either, but nobody dwells on joy, so it doesn't matter much.
The thing about unhappiness for me, is that i like to feel it alone. I dont like being around people when i'm unhappy, especially if i think they're trying to cheer me up. It's like i'm unhappy, and i dont like it, but i know that's how i should be feeling. Sometimes i think that i get some good thinking in when i'm unhappy, but it might be wishful thinking.
So what can music be? Does it only exist because it's easier to relate with tones then it is with words? Cause i'm pretty sure that has to be true. When you hear music, your reaction is involentary. Words on the other hand are too definate, you have to understand what a word means to relate to it. Nobody understands music's effect on people.
So there's some thought for you, for me. Thought driven by dissatisfaction. So i'll just hurt my face a little more, munching on garlic. I'll tell myself again that i wont smoke pot. I'll wish that i was fasting. I'll miss the loneliness that I didn't appreciate out west. And i'll try to find someone that i would be excited to spend my evening with. I'm very confused about what I want. Dont know what makes me happy, or even if i should be aiming for happiness. Aiming for health is nice, but it's harder to stick to.
I guess that's all i've got to say for now. I think september should be pretty cool.
So I've got a mic, and i've got recording software. I just ate, so i dont feel like singing, but soon i'll have some mp3s, at least on my computer. I'm not sure how i want to share them, i looked around the net and it seems like 3 songs is the most i can upload if i'm looking to do it for free. If i'm looking to pay three bucks a month, then musicv2.com seems like the best choice. I dont know why i'm sharing this information.
When i was driving home from buying a battery there was this father and a little kid crossing in front of me to go into home depot, and i slowed down a long ways away to let them pass, the dad looked thanks at me, i gave him a nice nod, and he shot out this huge thumbs up. It was increadable. I was elated, and soon after passing by i beat the steering wheel in a joyous outburst. It was just such a quality interaction.
I'm wondering if anyone has some sort of recording equipment that i can use. It doesn't have to be super awesome, i just wanted to play acoustic and sing, one take should do it for most songs. If i could then burn cds, that'd be great. If not, i could send them, via gmail to myself and get them that way.
So let me know if anyone out there has some sort of mic and computer. Maybe i'll buy you dinner. Unless it's dave. I dont owe you shit.
Well, i'm back home. I played the open mic, and it went well. Thanks for being there shan.
The people that showed up late already know i love them. The people that showed up after i left i may or may not like at all. But i'm glad you went.
Uh, home sweet home. Call me!
My mom is picking me up from halifax at 4:30 on the 17th. I should be back on the island at 8:30 or so. Should i run it right to baba's for open mic night? It will be a wednesday. It could be a place to meet people. I could play a few tunes, then have a few drinks with all that can show up. Certainly sounds plausable.
Fuck i look forward to being home. Cheers.
I leave ottawa on a plane on the 17th of augest at 2pm.
I'm on my last day off, probably 4-5 more workdays. This is seriously the homestretch. I like prince edward island, and i look forward to returning to it. If only the people that live there weren't all so damn ugly.
Peaches and Cream, my bitches.